A Stockbroker walks into the dentist and asks for an amount for getting a tooth pulled out.

‘Well,’ said the dentist, ‘That depends on the level of service. If you want to go private we can give you the very best and latest in dental treatment. We get an anesthetist in from the local hospital, and I get two very skilled, and pretty, dental nurses to help out. Guaranteed no pain, no blood.’

‘Sounds good,’ said the man, ‘how much?’

‘£200 per tooth.’

‘That’s extortionate!’

‘Well,’ said the dentist, ‘We can give you standard NHS treatment. I do the anesthetic myself – no nurses. You get a little bit of pain and a little bit of blood, but it’ll only cost you £20.’

‘No, that’s still too dear. Can you not do it a bit cheaper?’

‘Tell you what,’ said the dentist, getting angry, ‘I could get a pair of pliers from B&Q and do a homer for you. No anesthetic. Guaranteed very painful – lots of blood. Your mouth will hurt for three months and you’ll struggle to talk for at least two. I’d do it for £5 and take pleasure in it.’